A Toast to the Careless

Welcome home. After our first meeting you had me thinking. You had me wondering what will count as a real post. Went about in circles trying to figure out something that would please you. Yeah, your huge appetite had me scared. Walked about looking like a befuddled Bean-esque character till it hit me. Yeah, like the stench from the slaughterhouse it hit me. Ooh it hit me. “Fool, none of your readers really care about anything or at least they pretend not to so why not talk about that”, I told myself. Well I immediately got into the groove found a pen and paper and wrote this for you wonderful bunch.

Sorry if you actually do care about things, anything at all. This might sound a bit weird to you. Let’s get on with this party.

We claimed not to care, who wins or loses in the national elections because it does nothing for us. We made sure you all heard we would not waste our time voting when we could watch porn, download fresh episodes or pose in our bathrooms for our instagram pictures. Election day came, ended and ooh we still did not care. Yeah, we still claim not to. But please check social media and it is full of us talking about how fucked up the country is. Ooh you should hear our views. Still we don’t really care. We cannot care.

We are men, we don’t give a shit about who else the young lady is sleeping with. We don’t really care. We are just getting some and wait, she is nothing special. Just someone to pass the time like our boys suggested. But wait, just stick around, you might notice us checking our phones. Checking her last seen, finding that dude who keeps liking her pictures, and agonizing over the guy she is using as her avatar. At night we wonder why the hell she showed so much cleavage on social media. But hey its morning again, the sun is up, our friends are back and we don’t care. Again, we cannot care.

Here we are, young, sexy, sassy, hot and damn fine. We are the ladies you have wet dreams about. We coat our faces in three layers of paint and replace our eyebrows and lashes with the paintbrushes. You can’t tell us nothing. Ooh, we wiggle our bum shorts covered assets at you, you silly folks. You think we are sluts??? Ho-ho-ho you peeps are damn funny. You think we care. But wait why are the guys coming at us with only lust? Why are they all asking for nudes? Why do they just see us as objects to satisfy desires but not as people, people with emotions? Well, we wasted a few packs of tissues crying about this shit all day. But hey, it’s night. Got this purple wedge and we are partying all night. We don’t care. Read our heavily painted lips boo, “We cannot care”.

Is it really worth it? Is all the ridiculous playacting necessary? I mean, we are growing. Can’t we just let go of these insecurities. Yeah, there really could be a bunch who actually don’t care and we wish them well and hope they don’t go to bed with their roofs on fire. But if you are not one of that diseased lot, why don’t you get on with your life. Feel when you have to, be angry when you have to, hell, satisfy your craving for ice cream bro. So what if they are watching and judging you for caring. Just do care enough to actually take care of yourself and your own. Don’t let no one think for you.